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" And the answer is: Chatrooms are as safe or dangerous as you allow them to be.If you give out your personal information, download files or meet people in-person you have compromised your safety.I feel a bit betrayed and worry about whether I can trust him.When I spoke to him again about it, he did apologise and said he won’t do it again but he then came out with a load of stuff about how unhappy he was in the marriage, that we never spend time together (which is true), but I don’t think it is fair for him to blame me.Improving the marriage The discovery of your husband’s online world is a crisis in your marriage but it can also represent an opportunity.You could see this as a “wake-up call in your marriage to examine problems in the communication between the two of you and to address this.Relationship counselling agencies report that a growing number of couples are now seeking help due to infidelity online or to one partner accessing adult websites.How much of a problem it is, depends on the degree and type of access and what it means in the context of the marriage.
Recently, I discovered that my husband has been using adult chat rooms online and seems to have been communicating in sexually explicit ways with other people.
There is a big difference between a person occasionally viewing pornography with the knowledge and even involvement of their partner to a full-blown betrayal and using adult websites to start affairs with other people.
Like many problems, it can start innocently at first, with a person visiting sexually titillating sites perhaps out of boredom or a seeking escapism but then it can escalate to other behaviours, such as directly communicating with other people online and over time can become addictive and harmful.
Real intimacy is created in everyday communication, in the nitty-gritty of sharing a life together and in the hard work of resolving conflicts and accepting the other person as different to you.
For almost as long as chatrooms have existed, people have been asking the question "Are Chat Rooms Safe?