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I bet she’s fought her corner to play the latest Die Antwoord, The Knife or Five Finger Death Punch track, but that goddamn BBC Radio 1 regulator keeps turning her down.Or it could be that, along with journalists, estate agents and bankers, TV and Radio presenters are simply reviled by the general public and treated with an air of suspicion.(Yes, I realise her show starts at 10am – that’s still early for me, okay?) If you want me leaping out of bed on time, all you need do is submit me to the incohesive babblings of a ditzy try-hard.

“Rita likes Tyrone because, unlike some of her exes, he’s a one-woman man and not fame-hungry.“He does a lot of work for charity too and she finds that really attractive.And she has been really supportive of that.” While there’s no escape from his famous heritage, Tyrone — who grew up playing with MICK JAGGER’s children Lizzie and Jimmy and was even pictured aged three with MICHAEL JACKSON at Disneyland — has shunned the rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle for a steady job and a life of relative normality.There’s something about how happy they are all the time, a forced friendliness that screams, “I’M YOUR FRIEND,” when you know their lives are completely different to yours.In fact, they have the life you think you want, and here they are, pretending to be your friend, trying to lure you into their cause and convince you they’re right.

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