Cringe dating disasters
How could I ever resist the chance to ride in his ‘pussy mobile’ in which he gleefully told me he’d done a lot of ‘dogging’, I would be crazy to not take him up on that offer?!
Eventually he took the hint and left me alone but 5 minutes later I was bombarded with text after text about how he couldn’t stop thinking about me and ‘knew’ I felt the same way as he did about me. He called me his ‘posh bird’ and he said he already told his friends we were an item.
Truth be told I should have just ‘upped and left’ there and then but rather than let his careless words offend me, I settled down for the most intense first date I have ever been on.
Ladies let me tell you something, if a guy is boasting about the size of his dick then he either has a small wiener or thinks that his best chat up line is to think with his dick the entire time.But MR Tool was so self-assured that I was so won over by his ‘womanizing’ ways, that he proceeded to tell me just how well he thought the date was going.Not only did he tell me how much his friends would love me because I had a ‘smoking hot ass’ (I don’t know if he noticed but I also had a face and ya’ know an actual personality) but he also told me he had a ‘five year plan’.Have you ever been on a date so hilariously bad, that the only solution was to bury your head deep in the sand and pretend that the date never existed?Or perhaps your date was going swimmingly well until the ‘dicksand’ erupted and your date showed his/her true colours?